My Take on Gavin's Public Statement + Victim Blaming from the Peanut Gallery

Since the KTVB story aired, I've had several people ask what I think about Gavin's public statement, and others reach out to warn me about comments being made on KTVB's Facebook post. I've read it all, so rather than respond individually, I'll address it here.

First, Gavin's statement. I don't have much of an opinion about it, nor do I particularly care. It was exactly what I'd expect from a statement carefully prepared by the legal team his parents are probably paying for. They were careful not to admit to anything and used it as an opportunity to remind everyone that he's suffering too. Typical. I didn't expect accountability from a public statement, and I certainly didn't find any.

As for the Facebook comments, the majority were kind and sympathetic, which I appreciate. But there were also plenty of grown adults blaming me, or attempting to hold my 15-year-old son responsible for his own death. Interestingly, many of the those comments came from people I was able to identify as friends or associates of Gavin and his family. And yes, I documented the comments and the connections I could establish.

I've learned long before any of this that people who argue without facts generally aren't interested in the truth. I'm not going to waste my time trying to educate people who have already decided what they want to believe.

What I do find telling is the narrative coming from people close to Gavin. If this is how his friends and supporters are defending him publicly, it certainly makes me question what he's telling them privately. There seems to be a lot more effort going into portraying Gavin as a victim than acknowledging the choices he made that resulted in my son's death.

And I wonder whether any of these people understand the difference between standing by someone you love and standing in the way of their accountability.

But just so we're all on the same page:

Personal attacks, unsupported claims, and financial or political connections his family have mean nothing to me. I have already lost the one person in this world I couldn't bear to lose. I may have underestimated the complete lack of human decency some of Gavin's supporters are willing to display, they have foolishley underestimated the determination of a mother whose only child was killed. If anything, every attempt to discredit Sterling only strengthens my determination to fight for justice.

What does concern me is knowing that kids, teenagers, and friends of Sterling are reading comments from adults blaming their deceased friend. These kids have already experienced something horrific, and now they're watching grown adults publicly attack someone they love who isn't here to defend himself.

If you're one of those adults, do better. There are kids watching you, and you're setting a terrible example.

I hope one day, Gavin eventually takes all the drive, persistence, and determination he's put into fighting all of his criminal cases and channels that same energy into becoming a better person. I hope the people closest to him eventually understand that loving someone doesn't require excusing their behavior, and that meaningful change takes more than prayers and paychecks to attorneys.