July 11 Update

Hi Everyone,

For those of you who don't know me, I'm Sterling's mom, Kristin—though I call him Wolf.

I've been sitting in front of my computer for a long time trying to find the right words. Over the last nine excruciating days, this community has shown up for my family in ways I never could have imagined. There simply aren't words big enough to express my gratitude.

Your generosity has lifted a weight that no parent should have to carry while grieving. Instead of spending this week consumed by how I would afford to bury my only child, I have been able to put my energy into what matters most right now—loving Wolf, honoring his life, and preparing to say goodbye to his physical self in the way he deserves.

Thanks to everyone who has sent texts, meals, flowers, gifts, phone calls, hugs, words of encouragement, and for simply sitting with me in my grief. Thank you to his friends who created and continue to visit Wolf's memorial on Phillippi and Morris Hill Road, to everyone who has brought water to the kids on these hot days, to the people who have comforted me there, and to everyone who has shared stories about him. I love hearing about how kind he was and how he made people feel.

People often say they wish their kids would stay little because it all goes by too fast. While I wished time would slow down sometimes, I loved watching Wolf grow into exactly who he was meant to be. Every year brought a new version of him, and every version was my favorite. I am so proud to be his mom. He taught so many of us to be better, to do better, to be kind, and that everyone matters.

Like many of you, I have so many unanswered questions about what happened on July 2. I'm still in the dark—not because the Boise Police Department isn't working to figure it out, but because they are doing their best to piece everything together. Even though I don't know where this investigation will lead, what additional expenses may arise, or when I will be able to return to work, every contribution gives me a little more breathing room and one less thing to think about right now.

While I plan to reach out and thank donors, friends, and family individually when things slow down, it's important for me to thank the doctors and first responders who tried to save my son's precious life; Diane and the staff at the Ada County Coroner's Office, who treated both Wolf and me with such kindness and compassion; everyone involved in the ongoing investigation, including the Boise Police Department and the detective working on this case; Staff and Teachers at South Junior High; my coworkers at the American Red Cross of Idaho, Montana, and East Oregon, our Board of Directors, and especially our CEO, Nicole Sirak Irwin, for the check-ins, support, care, and for giving me the time and space I need to grieve; and the staff at Relyea Funeral Chapel for their patience, compassion, and guidance through this unimaginable process.

I've also received many questions about Wolf's services. I haven't been able to answer everyone because I've been trying to find the best way to celebrate his life while also giving our family some privacy during this incredibly difficult time.

That being said, we will be holding a private, invitation-only funeral for close family and friends on Monday, July 13.

To those who aren’t attending the funeral and were friends with him or close to him, please know it doesn’t mean you were less important in his life, it’s just a matter of giving our entire family and close friends who watched him grow up the opportunity to say goodbye. Wolf was the extrovert of our family and has such a large group of friends and I know many of you want the opportunity to honor him. We will be holding a larger public memorial where all his friends, our community, and everyone who knew and loved him can come together to share memories, music, laughter, and celebrate the incredible person he was. I promise I will share those details as soon as they are finalized.

In the meantime, if you already have my number, please don't hesitate to reach out if you have questions or if there is something you need to share with me. I may not always be able to respond right away, but please know I am reading your messages and feeling the love and support behind every one.

Note: Many of you have asked what else you can do to help. Right now, I ask that you continue to keep my son's friends who were there and witnessed the tragedy on July 2nd in your thoughts. They are carrying an unimaginable amount of pain and trauma, and they need support and compassion as they navigate something no young person should ever have to experience. If you know them, please check in on them, spend time with them, listen to them, and remind them they are not alone.

Thanks again for continuing to surround my family, Wolf’s friends, and our community with so much kindness and love. I’ll update this page when I have more information to share.

With gratitude,

Kristin